EDDIE IZZARD LIVE AT MADISON SQUARE GARDEN

Don't you just love dabbling about in the garden? No? Well I do. I find this holistic space a great way of expressing yourself through creation, whilst taking the piss out of God know what at the same time. Honest. I saw my made Eddie do just that in 2011, in this 90 minute stand-up show in a garden located somewhere in New York City. Bless him.

Eddie Izzard: Live At Madison Square Garden

THE STORY:

He's more powerful than a limp-wrested Aardvark. His sense of style would put someone in a coma to sleep. And his word-play can only be bested by himself in drag. Yes, my friend. That is correct. Eddie Izzard is in the Garden. Madison Square Garden. Primed and ready to kick ass and take names.

OK, admittedly, not 'primed' or 'ready' per-say. And the only person Eddy could kick in the posterior, is somebody without a body. Still, who cares, right? Just as long as the Ed-meister-general talk's a load of b*ll*cks to shed load of yanks; I'm sure everything will be spick and spam again. Yeah, you know, stuff like: (1) God. (2) Science. (3) Dinosaurs. (4) Computers. (5) Hunter / Gathers. (6) Animals. (7) Civilization. And (8) Evolution.

Here, for some extra added depth to this Izzard-a-thon, check out some of the stuff he comes out with:

Tonight I will talk to you about everything that has ever happened -- with some gaps.
'Mein Kampf' is German for 'I'm going to kill everybody'
God must have had more than one son. There was A-sus. B-sus. C-sus. D-sus. E-sus. G-sus. Excreta. Excreta. Excreta.
Why the long pause? Said the barman to the bear.
Dinosaurs were crap. All they ever did was get up in the morning and go 'ARRR'. And that's about it.
When the pilgrim's came to America they said "F*ck Zee. We're going to call it Zed from now on".
The Stone Age began on Tuesday, around about three-thirty in the evening.
5 minutes until downloading is complete. 3 minutes until downloading is complete. 2 minutes until downloading is complete. 8 minutes until downloading is complete. 9 hours until downloading is complete. 6 days until downloading is complete. Oh f*ck it! I've signed too many agreements with iTunes already.
The good news is that it works. The bad news is that it's not a gun. It's a vacuum cleaner.
Farming isn't sexy.
Spartan men -- RRrrrr. Spartan women -- Grrah. Spartan children -- Grr. Spartan dogs -- Woof. Spartan cats -- Meow. Spartan badgers -- Eeeek. Spartan sheep -- Bahh.
Romans had viaducts and aqueducts amongst others. Heck, they had all the ducks imaginable. But their language was still silly.
Charles Darwin and Charles Dickens lived a few vowels away from each other.
It's not my joke. It's God joke. Blame him.
Throwing up is like an opera. No one knows what's going on and it lasts too long.
Honestly, would you listen to a burning hedge?
Thy shall not covert thy neighbors ox? What? But he's not my neighbors! He lives opposite me in number 34.

Now in closing his show, Ed takes the piss out of God, Pink Floyd, plus Darth Vader, living on the dark side of the moon together, before being signed out by a giant squid. Yemen.

THE REVIEW:

I thought that it would be a good idea if I'd take a leaf out of Eddie's book, and start off my b*llsh*t on a tangent. Here, check out these facts about the venue where Mister Izzard performed this show. (1) This 'multi-purpose' indoor arena is situated on top of Pennsylvania Station, in Midtown Manhattan, New York City, between 8th and 7th Avenues, and 31st and 33rd Streets. (2) The most resent incarnation of 'The Garden' was opened on the 11th of February, 1968, following a renovation of the previous 1925 version. (3) On average this venue hosts about 320 different events per year. (4) At present, this location is the home base for the 'New York Rangers', the 'New York Knicks', both sexes the 'National Basketball Association', plus the 'National Hockey League' too. (5) Not only does the 'Westminster Kennel Club' host their annual 'Dog Show' here, but the Democrats and the Republican's have also held their conventions here as well. Make up your own joke. (6) This was the venue where a number of noted boxing matched were fought -- such as Roberto Duran verses Ken Buchanan, and Joe Frazier verses Muhammad Ali. (7) Can you guess where George Harrison held his 'Concert for Bangladesh'? John Lennon made his final stage appearance with Elton John? Michael Jackson performed his 30th anniversary special? Or where Chuck Berry, Ricky Nelson, and Bo Diddley, commenced their rock and roll revival? No. Not the O2. It's here, silly. (8) Oh! While I am on the subject of music; did you know that Elton John currently holds the world record for the greatest number of appearances in 'The Garden'? Sixty-two shows to date. Billy Joel, on the other hand, currently holds the record for most consecutive gigs ever sold at this location. (9) How can this lo-cal not have a website -- http://www.thegarden.com/

Eddie Izzard: Live At Madison Square Garden Screenshot

Alright, I know what you're thinking to yourself -- "My God! Our ever loving reviewer has finally popped his gasket! And is now commencing his long and hard walk to cloud cuckoo land!". But don't fret, dear reader. I haven't -- yet. I just thought I'd listen to what Eddie said in 'Eddie Izzard Live At Madison Square Garden', and think 'out of the box'.

Well, that is what he does best, right? Our Eddie. So why not pay homage to that fact by going off kilter with my bullsh*t? Seems appropriate on some level; especially when you take into consideration how this stand-up show was conceived.

You see, being a bit of a comedy buff myself, I couldn't help but notice that Eddie has taken note of John Cleese's step by step guide to crafting his gags. (Step One) Pick a topic. (Step Two) Find out everything you need to know about said topic. (Step Three) Once you have figured out all the rules of said topic, reverse the principle and make it funny.

Granted, I know that this does sounds pretty simple on a conceptual level. Nonetheless, it's like what Python and many other noted comedians have said in the past -- you can't joke about something without know a bit about it to begin will.

OK, I have to admit, Eddie does throw some of his surrealist elements into the mix for good measure. Moreover, I do love the way that he uses 'cerebral word-play' to chop and change from one 'skit' to another 'skit', whilst having the freedom to flick off kilter at a drop of a hat.

Oh! One minute. That reminds me of something...