HULK IS BEST IN MARVEL UNIVERSE - SO SUCK MY PANTS

Hello, puny humans. Me am Hulk. You am reader. And you will now listen to me or otherwise I will, SMASH! OK. Not just, SMASH! I will growl too. Growl like angry big green giant who enjoy wearing purple underwear. Nice, aren't they? My underwear. They are very comfortable, and they make me think about rest of so-called heroes in Marvel Universe. Like those in...


Marvel Mightiest Heroes Graphic Novel Collection


Namor the Sub-Mariner -- Rahhhhh!. Hulk no like fish-man. Fish man piss hulk off coz he gave me wedgy during time in 'The Defenders'.

Captain America --  Ah-ha! That's more like it. Cap not like fish-man at all. Cap is very nice man. He has very shiny helmet.

Mr. Fantastic -- Hmmm. Play Doh. Hulk love stretching Play Doh. Its like playing with my willy.

The Invisible Woman -- Er? Me never seen that lady before. She never there when I... SMASH!!!

The Human Torch -- Me only like flame-head when it's cold weather. Cheap central-heating.

The Thing -- When Hulk and rock-man get together, we always have smashing time. HULK SMASH!!!

Thor -- Hmmm. Hippy-God is nice man like Captain-shiny-helmet. He smells like hair-conditioner too.

The Punisher - Why does angry-man shoot people to save them? He should be more like Hulk. SMASH. Not SHOOT!

Spider-Man -- Yes. Me love web-head. Me really-really love him. He remind Hulk of gobstopper. Very colorful and tasty to eat.  Yummmm!

Iron Man -- Shell-head look like car. Me love to SMASH car!

Iceman -- Ice-head like flame-head. Me only like him when it's hot weather. Cheap air-conditioning.

Professor X -- Why is professor in wheelchair?  He not cleaver enough to avoid SMASH!!!

Daredevil -- Blind-man is very dangerous man. He once stuck stick in Hulks anus.

Hercules -- Herc say he's God, but Hulk no believe him. If he was, he would afford better clothing.

Silver Surfer - Shiny-man is my friend. He once gave Hulk a shiny helmet like Cap's.

Beast -- Furry-man leaves fur everywhere when I SMASH him.

Dr. Strange -- Why is doctor not practice medicine? Hulk confused. Hulk want to take two tables and lie down.

Wolverine -- Sniff-Sniff! Can you smell bacon? Canadian bacon? 

Now Hulk can can go on and on and tell you more about heroes in Marvel universe. But Hulk no want to do that. Hulk want to direct you to the Marvel Mightiest Heroes Graphic Novel Collection. It is very good read. So go read. Go on. Or else Hulk will... err... you know I'm gonna say.