Have you ever wondered
who'd be the best superhero to go out on a date with? No? You haven't? Fair
enough. Neither have we. Still. That doesn't stop us from having a stab at
trying to figure out which hero would be best suited to our needs. So without any
further ado, here goes... errr... something.
Batman -- So if you're a sucker for the dark and brooding type,
please remember, that even though he may be stinking rich and pretty damn
handsome, I bet you anything he's f*cking cr*p at telling jokes.
Superman -- Sure. So he's the most powerful and most
popular superhero in the whole wide world. So what? I bet you anything he's boring
in the sack, and he'd most probably make the world move for you by accident.
Wonder Woman -- Just like Kal'l, on the surface Diana appears
like the type of person who seems to have it all. She's got the looks. She's
got the cleavage. And she's also got that whole patriotic costume thing going
on. But underneath it all, my friends, she sure is one hell of a stubborn cow.
And will always win an argument with her trusted lasso. Witch!
Green Arrow -- Did you know that this hooded cretin has been
married, divorced, and even cheated on his better half with a trained assassin?
OK. So he might possess a cute ass and designer stubble. But I tell you
something for nothing, I'm nigh on positive he uses his arrows for more than just
shafting crooks!
Flash -- Now you have to understand that Barry's special
power is that he's very-very fast at running and doing stuff. Yet as we all
well know, being fast at things can something make other things come out
somewhat prematurely. If you get my drift. Hint-Hint!
Green Lantern -- Just forget about this one, folks. Despite
Hal being a fairly nice looking character with the power of creation on his
finger, at the end of the day this womanizing git is to fidelity as monkeys are
to Chinese algebra.
Harley Quinn -- Do I even need to write anything here? She's
crazy and she's cute. So get over it already.
So there you have it, my friends. Who you should date if
you're dying to jump on a leather-clad-clod! I hope it helped. If not, boo-hoo,
what a shame. You're just going to have to date 'a normal' now, aren't you?
AN IDIOTS GUIDE ON WHICH SUPERHERO TO DATE
Reviewed by David Andrews
on
December 04, 2015
Rating: