JOKER’S DATING PROFILE (OTHERWISE KNOWN AS ARTHUR FLECK)

This month, Warner Bros. will be releasing the sequel to their 2019 film, 'Joker'. Aptly titled, 'Joker: Folie à Deux', the aforementioned sequel has been described as a musical psychological thriller that continues to chronicle the highs and lows of the titular character. It was directed by Todd Phillips and stars Joaquin Phoenix, Lady Gaga, and Brendan Gleeson. So, to celebrate its release, I thought that it would be a jolly good idea to take a look at the dating profile for one of the main characters, Arthur Fleck. Here 👇, check this out.

Personal information:
Full name: Arthur Fleck / Age: Younger than my mother / Occupation: Clown / Location: Gotham City / Relationship requirements: Preferably somebody with a good sense of humor and big tits / Longest relationship: 6 ft / Marital status: I'm married to my career

Distinguishing features:
Height: I'm slightly taller than my last victim / Weight: On my shoulders / Build: Slender / Hair color: Green or not green / Eye color: Yes

Other attributes:
How ambitious are you? It depends on my mood / Do you drink? With my mouth / Do you want children? For dinner or lunch? / Do you consume drugs? Yes, but only when I'm locked up in Arkham or can't stop laughing / Do you drive a car? No, but I can drive myself crazy

Favorite:
TV show: 'Diagnosis: Murder' / Song: 'Send In the Clowns' by Frank Sinatra / Actor: Daffy Duck / Band: Elastic / Comedian: Me / Film: 'Catch Me If You Can' / Color: Red / Meal: Banana split / Quote: 'Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die' - Mel Brooks

Hobbies:
Laughing. Killing. Pegging. Dressing up. Falling down. Telling jokes. Pretending to be sane. Fantasizing about feet. Singing in the rain. Reading in the dark. Dancing on the stairs. Blowing my kazoo. Collecting magic beans.

About me:
Hello. My name is Arthur, Arthur Fleck, but you may know me as that psychotic clown who two years ago shot and killed the popular late-night talk show host, Murray Franklin. Don't worry, though, because I'm feeling a lot better now. In fact, I've improved so much since my treatment, that the only time I don't think about killing someone is when I come up with new jokes. Do you want to hear a few? How about... I went to the doctor the other day and he told me that I have a very serious illness. So upon hearing this, I said, 'I want a second opinion', and he replied, 'All right, you're ugly as well'. Then there's... Knock, knock. Who's there? Axe. Axe who? May I axe you out on a date? So, what do you say? Fancy going out with me? I know that I look like a colorful bohemian, but come on, what have you got to lose? Apart from your life.

First date:
In my mind, I'd imagine our first date to be something truly romantic. I'd be wearing a purple tuxedo, an orange vest, a green shirt, and a brown and black pair of shoes, while you'll be sporting black stilettos, white fishnet stockings, and a black and red dress adorned with silver sequins. Together, the two of us will go to a plush restaurant in the city and eat, laugh, and be merry by dancing way into the night. Then once our bellies are full and our spirits are high, we'll slowly step outside into the crisp midnight air and stroll along a nearby canal. But suddenly, out of nowhere, a bold beacon will glare across the sky. A beacon that will abruptly stop our date by informing me, Arthur Fleck, otherwise known as the Joker, what I have to do next. Goodbye, my dear. We had a good time together, didn't we? Maybe next time you'll live a little longer. Kiss, kiss.